Home

Back home and finals are OVER!  I am sure I passed them all, (okay there was grace on the History final), but all is done and I am confident I passed everything.  Given I was on probation the first semester because I did not have an undergrad degree it is great to get past that and be under normal status.  I know, I know, all of you are saying I will never be considered "normal".  Don't worry, I live my life outside of normal. 

Of course it is pretty crazy trying to get everything done for Chirstmas in just a few days.  I think we pulled it off though.  Now we have to wrap everything. 

I had a meeting with Tampa General yesterday.  This is where I am going to do my CPE this summer.  CPE is Clinical Pastoral Education.  While it is about ministering to people in time of sickness and crisis it is more about me getting in touch with my issues and things that have happened as I grew up so that I can deal with them rather then them coming out at a later date while I am ministering to someone. 

Danielle moved out recently.  She moved in with one of her best friends.  Hope they stay that way. 

Lucky passed away on Tuesday.  We knew he was heading in that direction, but it is still hard when it happens.  Lucky and I always had a contentious relationship as he thought he was the alpha male of the family and of course I was not going to give that up, so we agreed to disagree.  Deb and the girls however are pretty hard hit and still dealing with it.  I told the vet she could do a necropsy if she wanted for edcational purposes and she did and let us know that he had a huge tumor on one of the lobes of his liver.  It was about the size of a softball.  Looks like there was nothing we could have done.  Still it is hard to say good-bye to him.  You become used to having him around.  I hope we are able to hold off getting another dog until our lives settle down and we are going to be somewhere for a while. 

Our family wishes you a blessed Christmas and holiday season.  "for unto us a savior is born..."

Two weeks left.  I almost wish there was an additional week as there is still a lot to do.  4 Papers, and study for finals.  We have had a cold streak or it is supposed to be this cold up here, I don't know.  30's to 40 at night and upper 40's to low 50's in the day.  Been 7 years since I experienced cold every day.  Feels pretty good actually, so far.  We had our Lessons and Carols service here at Christ Chapel last night.  We have it at my field church on Wednesday night this week.  The music director is bringing a 60 student choir from the school where he is the music director.  We are serving dinner afterwards.  We normally have 150 per week between two services.  We have been told to expect 180-200 total.  The church will easily handle this many as it is never even 1/2 full, other than the ordination that was celebrated for the son of the congregation. 

I did the rough edit to piece our video of our homeless project for Pastoral Care and Jason and Tom did the polishing, which is where it really came together.  It turned out very good.  I am excited to show it in class.  As I understand things, our IT director makes copies and puts them all on a DVD and gets them to all the class members so we have a copy of each teams video to keep.  I look forward to having that.  

I know the Christmas season is always so stressful.  I hope we all just take a step back and stop listening to the retailers and the marketers that try to tell us how Christmas should be celebrated if you want to be "really happy".  I have really come to try to simplify Christmas and focus on the celebration of the coming of our Lord.  However, I am totaly out gunned and out spent by all of the marketing.  We get so caught up in having to make everything TV perfect.  Life is not that way and it causes many people to become depressed and stressed because they can't live up to the picture perfect Christmas.  Please just do what you can, don't commit to what you can't, enjoy the company of your friends and loved ones, and praise God that he gave us His one and only Son to save us from sin.  Who cares if your Christmas dinner came from Publix or Sonny's or Bob Evans.  It is about enjoying the love our God shows to us and through us. 

Have a great week.  I need to get back to Greek.  I leave you with this thought:

"The spirit produces love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, humility, and self-control.  There is no law against such things as these."  Galatians 5:22-23

Back in the Saddle Again

Back from Thanksgiving break and back into the swing of things. This time I got right back into school. Good thing too, plenty to do with only three weeks left. Back to my field church on Sunday. They offered fruitcakes for sale a while back. They came in and I picked mine up. Yum, yum. I think I am one of the four people in the world that like fruitcake. There is a real chill in the air up here. It got down into the upper 30’s last night. Cold! Got done with Greek tonight and got an 88 on my quiz. I missed the translation form on one set of verb endings.


We are done with our Worship Practicum class. Good to have a class passed. One down, five to go. I did finally get registered to go to Atlanta for my Cross Cultural experience in January. I have also been able to work things out to go to Tampa General over the summer for my CPE for 11 weeks. I have not even passed all of these courses and we have to register for next semester. I did that taking 20 hours, but only getting credit for 17. The Greek I am taking is a non-credit course as it is a requirement for getting into the program. That is why they offer the summer Greek so you can have it out of the way to start your first year. I am taking a heavier load then usual to catch up with what I will have fallen behind not taking Greek readings and Hebrew this year. I don’t want to be trying to catch up next year as from what I hear Hebrew is worse than Greek and I will still have Greek readings on top of the Hebrew.

We had a presentation of the pro side of the Church-Wide Assembly decisions today from one of the professors. Good presentation and included some things that I had not heard before. Mostly that while the Bible says that God blesses one way of life it doesn’t say anything about condemning another way of life, such as single, or married and childless for example. Interesting approach that I had not heard before to refute the scriptural approach so often used to speak against this way of life. We are supposed to have another professor speak to us in the same manner but against the decision of the CWA. This is very informative as speaking to both sides of this will be required I think to minister to everyone in a congregation. At this point I am still in the middle and don’t know which side I will move to IF I move to a side. It will be interesting to see what the Council tasked with developing the HOW all of this will happen comes up with. That might alienate even more people or it might allow some people to say, “I think I can live with this”. To me it is very interesting to be in the middle of this as it plays out. Of course my human impatience wants to know all of the answers now rather than wait for them to play out. For me this continued dialog is valuable. I hope others see value in it and I hope it continues.

If I don’t get back here before then, root for the Gators on Saturday afternoon against Alabama. They win and they go to the National Championship game.

I leave you with: “When they heard this they were cut to the heart, and said to Peter and the other apostles, “Friends, what are we to do?” “Repent” said Peter, “and be baptized, every one of you, in the name of Jesus the Messiah; then your sins will be forgiven and you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit.” Acts 2:37-38

Two more days and I will be home to see my family and home congregation! This semester has flown by. When we get back from Thanksgiving we only have three weeks left in this semester. Wow! We have a Greek test Tuesday night that we are studying. Kind of feels like the holidays are approaching up here due to the weather. We have been about 50 degrees that last few days and it has been rainy yesterday and today.

6 of us went down to help pass out hot dogs and chips to the homeless Saturday. I saw many of the same faces that we saw when we went down to the coffee ministry several weeks ago. This was probably 12-14 blocks from the coffee ministry. They had about 90 people show up. The church that puts this on every Saturday had plenty of people this weekend because The University of South Carolina is on a bye week and little league football is over. There was also another church that comes out sometimes that had clothing to pass out. Blankets must be a real valuable thing because you had to have a picture ID to get one, if they still had one when you got to the table. We passed out a LOT of food. Hot dogs, chips, chili, sweets, bananas and soda. Some people went through 2, 3, 4 times. I couldn’t eat that much, but then again they may not have eaten that day or even last night. It was good to do this. The bad thing we realized on Sunday when it was 50 and raining, heavy at times, is that these same people have to go out in this to find food today and every day. They need to stay dry and warm, yet even if they find a place that fits those needs, they have to get out, probably carrying everything with them, and go find food. Rain or shine. It can get to you if you think about it much. Of course, some people there we not homeless, they just don’t have any money for food once they pay their rent, utilities, and for a car. This allows them to get some food and yet keep their place so that they don’t become homeless also. This is a good thing. I talked to one guy out there that said he can stay at his mother’s house whenever he wants, he just prefers to be out with his friends. Some are out there because they choose to be, some have been out there so long they don’t really know anything else, some would give anything to get back into society. It seems to me what keeps most of the ones that want out but can’t get out is an addiction or some sort of mental illness. They can’t qualify for the programs to get them back on track because they are using or drinking. The ones with mental illness probably need someone full time as a caretaker to make sure they take medicine and don’t do anything harmful to themselves or others. That’s pretty hard when you can’t even earn an income to keep yourself off of the street.

As Thanksgiving approaches I hope we all take a moment to think about what we are thankful for and to thank those around us that we feel this way about. We don’t say or act it near enough. I am thankful for everyone in my life. I have gotten to the point where I don’t really dislike or hate anyone, I more feel sorry for what causes them to be the way they are. At least at this time I hope I am learning from everyone in my life. I was asked in Spiritual Direction what my “on one foot recital of the law” would sound like. Here goes; “to hand my life to God (Father, Son and Holy Spirit) and trust in him to lead me through it, and to understand everyone I meet from their perspective”. I will leave you with that thought.

Happy Thanksgiving!

The game on Saturday was a blast.  The game was close until the fourth quarter so that kept it exciting.  The half time presentation was great also, as they honored the branches of the military.  At the end they had a fly over with the missing man formation.  I think that is the first time I have been to an event that had a fly over.

Everyone here is studying for the test this week or writing a paper due for the Middlers(2nd year).  Pretty quiet around campus with everyone studying.  Back to another week of studying.

I talked to my former boss last night and they are in the process of trying to wrap up a large chunk of business that I had been working on for about 6 months before I left.  Good to know that business might come around, it will be a good boost in the arm for the company in this economy. 

I think I can start a count down to getting back home and seeing my family and church.  9 days until I am back!  Be safe, be good, spread the good news! AMEN.

Studying for a History of Christianity test next week.  LOTS of information, names, dates, places.  There was a lot going on in the church at this time.  We are working on baout 400 till about 1100.  Many things were going back and forth during that time.  Powere between the Pope and the emperor, the Iconoclasic controversy.  Everytime a new emperor or pope came on the scene things changed.  At one time back then the church owned abotu 1/3 of the property in western Europe.  That seems problematic in itself.  Also learning about the Monastic movement and the monasteries, especially St. Benedict and his rules. Interesting stuff.  In high school and college I never had any interest in this, now it is really interesting to me.  I guess we mature and change.

Looks like I will get to go to the Gator South Carolina game tomorrow.  That should be fun.  Go Gators!  I will let you know.  Sitting in the car dealership to get some warranty work done.  They just told me the car is ready.  Got to go.  God bless you and keep you safe.

Go Dove! Yes we are the LTSS Dove.

We are the LTSS Dove.  Our flag football team is at Luther Bowl in Gettysburg this weekend. The update has come out that we won our first game 6-0 over Chicago seminary (I forgot the name of the school). They have to play possibly 4 games today if they go all the way. You know why I am not there. I don’t come close to having the stamina to do that kind of thing anymore. In the past that wouldn’t have stopped me, but I am getting smarter.


This has been somewhat of a lighter week for us. That has been much appreciated. We have still had homework that is due next week in a paper and an Annotated Bibliography as well as our usual load of reading. We also have a video due in Pastoral Care on December 11th. That date is fast approaching. Chris and I got together this morning and prayed for help as we are using this model called the Holy Ground Model. It is a model of steps that help us to deal with life and life in ministry. It is good, I like having a process (through this class I also find out I am a monkey followed closely by a giraffe), more about that at another time. Monkey’s love process, sometimes more than the results. Who me? Anyway back to the story; it takes a little swimming in the pond to get this model and be able to use it. We are still swimming at this point where the video is concerned. We prayed for help, admitted that we didn’t really understand this and prayed more for the Holy Spirit to come upon us and give us what the Lord wanted us to present for our video. Sure enough out of this meeting came a good narrative and most of a script for the other members of our group to shoot and edit. Our God is an awesome God!  We have 6 in the group so we are able to divide the tasks so that no one gets overburdened with this. Whenever we got together as 6 we did a lot of conceptualizing, but we were not really able to make any progress on details. Today we made great progress on details and I think, after presenting to the rest of the group for input and changes, we are ready to move to the steps of shooting the video. We have 15 minutes to show the video, present a paper about our experience and take questions. That might not seem like much, but you can get a lot of video in 10 minutes. We hope to tell a whole story. By the way our topic is homelessness. This is the project that is behind us going down to the coffee ministry early on Friday morning several weeks ago.


Remember I asked you to think about if God is happy? Here is why. I have been contemplating this for several weeks now; God is our creator, He is active in our lives through at least His Holy Spirit on a daily basis and His Son for our salvation and probably other ways that we don’t realize yet. Given that He is active in our lives and He is our creator (think parent?), does He not grieve over our sinfulness? The closest thing I can relate this too is being a parent. I would grieve in that situation. I have two great kids and I still grieve about certain things. Some of us, as a defense mechanism, need to disconnect from someone when they become especially sinful. Of course, that is a human reaction. I question, how could He be happy when His creation is the way it is? I know that Jesus came to save us, but according to doctrine that is only for those that come to faith and possibly those that were never given the choice (who never heard the good news of Jesus Christ). I go down the path a little ways that He could be happy if Jesus Christ came to save all of us, because He knows the outcome and it is all good. We all come back to him redeemed. Wouldn’t that be great? (I know where you are going with Hitler and Charles Manson and others. I prefer to hope that they are redeemed, which means they would somehow see the light and become remorseful of their sins and because of that Jesus Christ died for them also). At that point His reaction to our sinfulness could be “go ahead, it doesn’t really matter because my Son saved all of you”. I hope and pray that is the case, but have nothing on which to base that theory other than possible interpretation of some scripture. So, since I don’t know this is the case, I have to think that only those that come to faith will be saved, which will leave many wanting in on that day as we continue to increase our lack of respect and love for one another and continue to become a non-worshipping society. If this is the case, how can this not cause grief to our God, our creator? Can you see how He could flood the earth and start over? He has promised to never do that again, but it starts to give me a one millisecond in time snapshot of the emotions He must have. His love is so great that we will only understand it when we are with Him. Are His other emotions that great also? Think of Sodom and Gomorrah, the Great Flood, the wiping out of complete societies in Canaan, the Egyptians. What is your thought on this? If you can’t leave me a comment you can e-mail me at sje0424@yahoo.com . I look forward to replies as I continue on this contemplation. As I am learning here, we discern things individually and in community. Otherwise we are very prone to going down odd paths that lead to wrong beliefs.

Have a great weekend. I leave you with: “Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness; for we do not know how to pray as we ought, but that very Spirit intercedes with sighs too deep for words. And God, who searches the heart, knows what is the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints according to the will of God.” Romans 8:26-27 NRSV

It has been a good week.  We got the rest of our tests and papers back this week.  I have gotten at least a 90 on all of my tests and my papers were an A and a B.  I will take all of those and run!  As it gets closer to finals things will naturally slide some as everything comes together at once.  At least it looks like there is some room for that.  I think I am starting to relax just a bit with this. 
We had Homecoming on Friday night.  That was fun.  Halloween costumes, smoked pork, pot luck, band of seminarians played for a while, and a service at 8:00 in the quad.  Fun time. 
We don't have Intro to Bible this week as the professor is out of town.  We do have an Annotated Bibliography due in this class next Monday.  We have all been working on these.  If we have more than 2 formatting errors we get them back to do again.  Not anybody's idea of a fun time.  If anyone reading this is an expert on Chicago Manual Style formatting of bibliography's please let me know, I would love to have an expert set of eyes on this before I turn it in.  We also have a two page paper due in History next Monday comparing St. Augustine's theology to that of Pelagius.  Now that's a barn burner of a topic that should keep us up all night!  I love this place!
It rained most of today and is only 59 heading down to 48 tonight.  In my field church I sang the Kyrie for the first time today.  I have done this a lot but this was a different setting and I have a problem with getting one setting in my head and getting rid of it to put a new setting in my head.  Did that make sense?  Anyway, after practice it went fine, but then I followed it up by starting the wrong Creed.  The challenge here is that our altar is against the wall and we turn to the altar for prayers.  I started, no one followed and I was turned away from them to see what might have been wrong.  Luckily pastor saw what I did and restarted with the correct version.  Oh well, more proof that we are all human.  I seem to love to prove that. :)  Just let me do your will Lord.  What comes from that I am fine with.
How 'bout them Gators!  'nuff said.
There was a weekend retreat to an abbey this weekend.  I just talked with one of the guys that went and it seems like a great experience.  They get up at 2:50am everyday and pray.  They gather to pray 7 times a day, each one being a 30-60 minute service.  I could not go this year as I didn't want to miss my field church.  However, I am hopeful to be able to go next year.  This is the time to experience as much as I can and I can't imagine getting to experience this after I am in a congregation, but who knows what the Lord has in store for me. 
I hope all of you are doing well.  I pray for you and hope that your faith in God deepens and your willingness to turn your life over to His will increases.  Remember the little voice inside is the hardest to hear and follow.  God bless each of you.  Steve

2 More Tests Behind Us

Tuesday night, crash night. Intro to Bible test today and Greek quiz over two chapters after break. I don’t know how I did on the Intro to Bible but I am confident that I passed it. In Greek I got a 100 on my quiz. She was easy on us, we had much more to learn in the two weeks than what she tested us on. Grace abounds! Thank you Lord! I think this calls for a glass of wine. We get our History test back tomorrow. It will be good to see how I did on that. The Intro to Bible was a lot easier to study for and to take in my mind. It was much more straight forward than the History test. Good to get under our belt. Now on to the papers that need to be written over the next two weeks. We might get our Pastoral Care test back tomorrow also. I will let you know on both accounts.


I have to sing the Kyrie this week at church. I have sung the Kyrie many many times, but never this setting. The choir director came over and worked with me this afternoon so I should be pretty good to go I guess.

It looks like the Cross Culture experience I had tried to put together in Sarasota is not going to come through. I had talked with Pastor Steve about it while I was back and he suggested contacting Pastor Levinson Lauvanus in Haiti. I think the experience of going down there for 10 days would be better than what I had planned. Selfishly I was trying to stay near home, but I guess the Lord has other plans for me. I do have the mindset that now is the time to experience as much as I can. I guess I am going to get a chance to put that into practice. Of course I still need to see if this will work with Pastor Lauvanus.

It has been raining all day. About 60-65, kind of cold in the rain. I hope it stops before the ordination tomorrow night. And hopefully I am able to get some in tennis this week.

That is all for tonight. I am pretty brain dead. I am surprised at how much fit into my head this week. The Lord is wonderful! I leave you with “Day after day they met as a group in the Temple, and they had their meals together in their homes, eating with glad hearts, praising God, and enjoying the good will of all the people. And every day the Lord added to their group those that were being saved.” Acts 2:46-47 GNB AMEN! Go in peace to serve the Lord!

It is Sunday and I just got back from my field church. We are celebrating an ordination there on Wednesday evening. One of the members of the church just graduated and got his first call. Everyone is very excited. I am looking forward to going. Everyone was happy to see me back after being home last week for break. They offer out a small scholarship for a seminarian each year and they awarded it to me. That was so great. It is a memorial fund for a young man that got sick and died before he could get to seminary, even though he had been accepted. What a great way for his name to live on. I am so appreciative of their generosity. The great thing is that of all the people I know in the congregation, (remember they don’t wear name tags), I probably know this couple and another couple that are good friends with each other the best. That makes it extra special.


I know at Faith they are dedicating their building this weekend. Deb lets me know that it has been a great Friday evening and Saturday so far. I imagine that Sunday will be nothing less. What a great thing, a blessing that the Lord has given that congregation. Now they need to use it to minister to the community as I know they are working towards. It is a beautiful building with lots of room for youth activities. Open the doors, here they come.

I did get to hit the tennis ball around Friday late afternoon. It felt so good to get out and hit again. I could only manage about 45 minutes, but I did get out and hopefully started working my way back into playing again. I have to tell you though that my hips are so sore! My legs are a little sore, but the hips, whoa. I have been working out for 6 weeks to get to this point. I guess I didn’t realize just how out of shape I had become.

Studying for two tests on Tuesday. Intro to Bible and Greek quiz. Studying for Intro to Bible is coming along pretty well. Greek, I still have some work to do. After these are done things start to get heavy with papers. I did get my first paper back and got an A. This was an easy one as it was our understanding of the world in AD250. No bibliographies, footnotes, etc. They start to get longer from here on out and incorporate all those things I haven’t used in maybe over 30 years. At least I got by with writing my understanding. After having written for business and speaking I was not too sure how academia would look upon my style. So far so good.

I am starting to get just a little hint of a thought that things are going to be ok here. I will get past being on probation since I don’t have my degree and I will be ok going forward. It’s a little hint of a thought that has started to pop up in my head the last week or so. It would be nice to develop it into a full blown thought and from there a concept and a confidence. I will take it as it comes, as the Lord gives it to me.

Beautiful 48 degrees this morning. Should be 72 today. Come on Florida, I saw your high is only supposed to be 82. That is cool for down there. Probably a beautiful day also.

Back to the books, since I just finished lunch. Sermon today was on forgiveness. “Happy are those whose transgression is forgiven, whose sin is covered. Happy are those to whom the Lord imputes no iniquity, and in whose spirit there is no deceit.” Psalm 32:1-2 NRSV Remember to pray for your enemies for you cannot hate someone for whom you pray.

Back to School

Got back to school about 1:00am on Tuesday night.  Kind of late, but we didn't have anything on Wednesday until our CPE interviews starting at 12:50pm.  My interview went fine.  I am trying to get into Tampa General but talked to Wake Forest as a back up.  Both are big programs that should allow me to experience many things.  BOY has it been hard to get my head back on for school.  I slipped back into the world of living at home way to easily and am now struggling to get back to where I was before I left.  We have a mid-term in Pastoral Care tomorrow that everyone is studying for.  Then it is Intro to Bible and Greek on Tuesday. 

Looks like I get to hit the tennis ball around tomorrow afternoon, which I am so looking forward to.  It has been a long time since I played and I miss it.  I hope this leads to a regular group that wants to play doubles every week. 
My pondering question of the week:  Is God happy?  Think about it and I will give you more of my thinking behind the question over the weekend.  For now, I have to get back to studying my Pastoral Care.  May the Lord bless you and keep you.  May His face shine upon you and may the grace and mercy that surpasses all understanding be with you now and forever, Amen.

Back Home!

Got home last night and it feels good to be back and reconnect with the family.  The airport and the planes last night were packed.  Of course this time of year that is not surprising as the snowbirds start heading back down to FL.  I am glad to not be traveing all the time anymore.  Just before I left for the Charlotte airport I found out that I got a 90 on my Greek test.  :):)  I did get 10 chapters of my History of Christianity book read on the plane from Atlanta.  Spent the morning working on the yard.  I can definitley tell I am in much better shape from working out since I was able to do about twice as much work as I was able to do before I left. 

The phallacy about this break is that we have a lot of homework that we need to do while we are on break.  We have a midterm in Pastoral Care on Friday when we get back and a test in Intro to Bible the following Tuesday.  Don't get me wrong.  I will take it even with the tests.  It is sure great to get to see the family.

I have been watching the Gator game today.  As I understand things, Jason got a chance to go to the game.  What a game to get to see in person.  I am sure he is worn out from that game.  Gators 23, Arkansas20.  Toooooooo close!  South Carolina is on against Alabama in about a half an hour. 

It feels good to be home, but I have to admit, trying to do school and live at home or have everyone up there would be very challenging.  I know how much I have to get done this weekend and I can already feel it getting tough to do all the things they want to do and the things I need to get done.  The Lord is providing and it is working.  I am really looking forward to church in the morning.  It will be great to see everyone.  It also worked out that the bloodmobile will be there this weekend so I am able to keep up with that.  From here I think I am back every four weeks.  Thanksgiving and then end of semester for Christmas break. 

One of the things I can see coming back is that we have WAY too much clutter around this house and we need to get it out of here to get the house on the market.  I think we need to just call Goodwill or Salvation Army and have them come tak about half of our stuff away.  It would be great to do a garage sale, but I think emotionally and mentally it would do us mor good to just get this stuff out of here.  I have to admit if I never have to cut grass again or worry about maintenance I will be happy.  This may be the last house we ever own. 

I pray that you are able to see God working in your life as it happens.  That has made such a difference in my life.  I think up until that point God is a head thing, at least I think it was in my life.  I think when I was able to see God working in my life as it was happening I started the coversion to the heart.  Once He gets into your heart, look out.  I just thank Him for loving me and claiming me as worthy to do His will.  Steve

WE ARE OFFICIALLY PAST THE FIRST TESTS!

Boy does it feel good to get these first tests behind us and realize that there is life after tests at seminary.  At the start of our History test a bunch of Middlers came in and calmed us down and said a prayer for us as well has had a bunch of snacks for us when we got done with the test.  That was so cool!  Apparently it is a tradition and I hope to be able to pass it on next year.(that would mean that I passed this year and am back for MY Middler year).  I have awarded myself a glass of wine and the evening off.  We only have Contextual Education in the morning and a workshop in Pastoral Care left this week.  Then it is home for 4 days!!!
When we get back we have our CPE interviews on Wednesday.  I am hopeful to get into the program at Tampa General.  If not probably look into KC to see if there is a site so I can stay with family. 
It poured on us Monday, was incredible Tuesday and back to light rain all day today.  It is only 61 degrees and with the rain it is pretty chilly.  I know Florida, sorry.
I hope to catch up on my TV shows tonight and just take it easy.  I went with pastor for my two visitations today.  They are both close to the church and I was back in an hour and a half.  Pastor still has to go and give communnion once a month as they don't do the pre-consecrated communion here.  Both ladies are in nursing homes.  I don't mind so much going into them but it takes a special kind of person to work there all day long.  That person is not me.  I praise and bless those that do. 
OK, I forgot to tell you that I think I did pretty good on both tests, but probably better on the History test.  The only thing I did not know for sure was the meaning of "bellius".  I must have remembered it wrong because even after looking in the index to our book and googling it I still don't know what it means.  Maybe it was a plant question to see what crazy answer we would put since they stressed do not leave any answer blank.  We also got an extra credit point for giving the teacher a clean joke,  Remember this place is all about grace and getting us through here.  I know you want to know mine so here it is:  How can you tell that a blonde has been making chocolate chip cookies?  There are M&M shells on the floor.  :)
I think that is enough for today.  The Spirit of the Lord rest on you; the spirit of wisdon and understanding, the spirit of counsel and might, the spirit of knowledge and fear of the Lord; and the blessing of God, Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, be among you and remain with you always.  Amen.

Just a quick post today.  We have Greek test tomorrow night and History of Christianity on Wednesday.  Studying is going pretty good especially considering I haven't done it in so many years.  I get my base notes and I just start copying them over and over until I know them.  It seems to be working for me at this point, but the real test will be the grades on these tests.  I have asked for names of people that could give me some tutoring in Greek.  I know it pretty well, but with only one class a week and a new lesson every week with new words and new way rules I can't afford to fall behind.  The structure seems to be that you can never breathe and get comfortable with what you have learned because it i always on to the next.  I lived my life that way for a lot of years.  It is not near as much fun as stopping to smell the flowers once in a while.

I go home on Friday for 4 days.  Looking forward to that.  6 weeks away, but it has flown by for me at least.  Off to chapel and study session for History test.  God bless you and keep you safe!  Steve

Who and Whose am I?

In our Pastoral Care class we have talked about the following: The closer an issue is to your sense of identity, the more PAIN is experienced, the more TIME it takes to work through, (40 days in the Bible means “very long time” (in Dr. Everett language as long as it takes.)), the more COMPLEX it is, and the more you NEED OTHERS, and the more DEPENDENT we are on GOD.


This story, sent to me via e-mail must have hit close to my identity and I can only think in a negative way. I am not this person, yet my brain tells me that I should be more like this. I think the trouble is that the feeling has not traveled the dreaded head to heart hi-way yet. The distance between your head and your heart can be the most difficult distance you will ever experience to travel.

I will let you read the story and see if it has the same effect on you. I was in tears by the end, not for the man, but because I am not the person that would have stopped.

TO MEET SUCH A MAN

I sat, with two friends, in the picture window of a quaint restaurant just off the corner of the town-square. The food and the company were both especially good that day.

As we talked, my attention was drawn outside, across the street.. There, walking into town, was a man who appeared to be carrying all his worldly goods on his back. He was carrying, a well-worn sign that read, 'I will work for food.' My heart sank.

I brought him to the attention of my friends and noticed that others around us had stopped eating to focus on him. Heads moved in a mixture of sadness and disbelief. We continued with our meal, but his image lingered in my mind. We finished our meal and went our separate ways. I had errands to do and quickly set out to accomplish them. I glanced toward the town square, looking somewhat halfheartedly for the strange visitor. I was fearful, knowing that seeing him again would call some response. I drove through town and saw nothing of him. I made some purchases at a store and got back in my car.

Deep within me, the Spirit of God kept speaking to me: 'Don't go back to the office until you've at least driven once more around the square.'

Then with some hesitancy, I headed back into town. As I turned the square's third corner, I saw him. He was standing on the steps of the store front church, going through his sack. I stopped and looked; feeling both compelled to speak to him, yet wanting to drive on. The empty parking space on the corner seemed to be a sign from God: an invitation to park. I pulled in, got out and approached the town's newest visitor.

'Looking for the pastor?' I asked.
'Not really,' he replied, 'just resting.'
'Have you eaten today?'
'Oh, I ate something early this morning.'
'Would you like to have lunch with me?'
'Do you have some work I could do for you?'
'No work,' I replied. 'I commute here to work from the city, but I would like to take you to lunch.'
'Sure,' he replied with a smile.
As he began to gather his things, I asked some surface questions. Where you headed?'
'St. Louis'
'Where you from?'
'Oh, all over; mostly Florida '
'How long you been walking?'
'Fourteen years,' came the reply.
I knew I had met someone unusual. We sat across from each other in the same restaurant I had left earlier. His face was weathered slightly beyond his 38 years. His eyes were dark yet clear, and he spoke with an eloquence and articulation that was startling. He removed his jacket to reveal a bright red T-shirt that said, 'Jesus is The Never Ending Story.'

Then Daniel's story began to unfold. He had seen rough times early in life. He'd made some wrong choices and reaped the consequences. Fourteen years earlier, while backpacking across the country, he had stopped on the beach in Daytona. He tried to hire on with some men who were putting up a large tent and some equipment. A concert, he thought. He was hired, but the tent would not house a concert but revival services, and in those services he saw life more clearly. He gave his life over to God.

'Nothing's been the same since,' he said, 'I felt the Lord telling me to keep walking, and so I did, some 14 years now.'

'Ever think of stopping?' I asked.

'Oh, once in a while, when it seems to get the best of me But God has given me this calling. I give out Bibles. That's what's in my sack. I work to buy food and Bibles, and I give them out when His Spirit leads.'

I sat amazed. My homeless friend was not homeless. He was on a mission and lived this way by choice. The question burned inside for a moment and then I asked: 'What's it like?'

'What?'

'To walk into a town carrying all your things on your back and to show your sign?'

'Oh, it was humiliating at first. People would stare and make comments. Once someone tossed a piece of half-eaten bread and made a gesture that certainly didn't make me feel welcome. But then it became humbling to realize that God was using me to touch lives and change people's concepts of other folks like me.'

My concept was changing, too. We finished our dessert and gathered his things. Just outside the door, he paused. He turned to me and said, 'Come Ye blessed of my Father and inherit the kingdom I've prepared for you. For when I was hungry you gave me food , when I was thirsty you gave me drink, a stranger and you took me in.'

I felt as if we were on holy ground. 'Could you use another Bible?' I asked.

He said he preferred a certain translation. It traveled well and was not too heavy. It was also his personal favorite. 'I've read through it 14 times,' he said.

'I'm not sure we've got one of those, but let's stop by our church and see'. I was able to find my new friend a Bible that would do well, and he seemed very grateful.

'Where are you headed from here?' I asked.

'Well, I found this little map on the back of this amusement park coupon.'

'Are you hoping to hire on there for a while?'

'No, I just figure I should go there. I figure someone under that star right there needs a Bible, so that's where I'm going next.'

He smiled, and the warmth of his spirit radiated the sincerity of his mission. I drove him back to the town-square where we'd met two hours earlier, and as we drove, it started raining. We parked and unloaded his things..

'Would you sign my autograph book?' he asked. 'I like to keep messages from folks I meet.'

I wrote in his little book that his commitment to his calling had touched my life. I encouraged him to stay strong.. And I left him with a verse of scripture from Jeremiah, 'I know the plans I have for you,' declared the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you; Plans to give you a future and a hope.'

'Thanks, man,' he said. 'I know we just met and we're really just strangers, but I love you.'
'I know,' I said, 'I love you, too.' 'The Lord is good!'
'Yes, He is. How long has it been since someone hugged you?' I asked.
'A long time,' he replied
And so on the busy street corner in the drizzling rain, my new friend and I embraced, and I felt deep inside that I had been changed. He put his things on his back, smiled his winning smile and said, 'See you in the New Jerusalem .'
'I'll be there!' was my reply.

He began his journey again. He headed away with his sign dangling from his bedroll and pack of Bibles. He stopped, turned and said, 'When you see something that makes you think of me, will you pray for me?'

'You bet,' I shouted back, 'God bless.'
'God bless.' And that was the last I saw of him.

Late that evening as I left my office, the wind blew strong. The cold front had settled hard upon the town. I bundled up and hurried to my car. As I sat back and reached for the emergency brake, I saw them....a pair of well-worn brown work gloves neatly laid over the length of the handle. I picked them up and thought of my friend and wondered if his hands would stay warm that night without them.

Then I remembered his words: 'If you see something that makes you think of me, will you pray for me?'

Today his gloves lie on my desk in my office. They help me to see the world and its people in a new way, and they help me remember those two hours with my unique friend and to pray for his ministry. 'See you in the New Jerusalem,' he said. Yes, Daniel, I know I will.

'I shall pass this way but once. Therefore, any good that I can do or any kindness that I can show, let me do it now, for I shall not pass this way again.'

'Father, I ask you to bless my friends, relatives and blog buddies reading this right now. Show them a new revelation of your love and power. Holy Spirit, I ask you to minister to their spirit at this very moment. Where there is pain, give them your peace and mercy. Where there is self-doubt, release a renewed confidence through your grace, In Jesus' precious Name Amen.'

I have been taking Wednesday evening off as kind of my Friday night, since our classes are mostly Mon-Wed. With the test next week in History and getting an e-mail today that I needed to re-write my Biblical paraphrase for Intro to Bible (I interpreted it rather than just summarizing it as required). I have that done and will deliver it in the morning. I have the first round of flash cards for History done and will fine tune over the next couple of days.


Grace appeared in History today. I think after seeing the glassy eyed stares in our eyes the last two classes (the dates, names, events were just too much at one time), she decided to hold off on any new material and made Monday a study session. To get a better idea of what it has been like the last two classes think of trying to catch all the water coming out of a fire hose with a Dixie cup. Yes, the Dixie cup is my brain. I thought I would just beat you to it! This was very good news, because Monday we were responsible for 9 more chapters after having only gone through 16 in 4 weeks.

Grace is obviously following me around as I probably should not be given the chance to re-write my paper for Intro to Bible.

We also have our first Test in Greek next week over lessons 1-5. I have been doing well on our quizzes as it is mostly memorization to this point. However on Tuesday night this week we got Adjectives. They don’t play by simple rules. Restated, they normally play by reasonable rules, but they can just go off the reservation on us. We are on break at the end of the week so we are getting in some mid-term type tests. Thankfully we do not have History and Intro to Bible in the same week. That would be a killer and I think both professors realize it.

We have had rain the last 3 days so it was nice when the sun finally came out this afternoon. We are supposed to be back up to 91 on Friday.

Jason was able to stop at the local Salvation Army location to see about talking to someone about the homeless. Come to find out they are selling their property very soon to build a new location. However, as luck would have it there is a Christian ministry for the homeless right across the street. They are very gracious and have offered to help us anyway that they can and give us access to any of their people to talk. There is another homeless ministry in town that another member of our group, Tom talked to today that has opened their doors to us also. I don’t know where this will lead for our project video, but I am looking forward to it.

Dr. Havens, our History teacher told us about online radio with much old time chanting. Some songs sound like you are in a monastery. I have been listening to it all day. http://www.ancientfaith.com/ is the website. Enjoy as I have been if you like this type of music.

I am into another great book for Pastoral Care. I really like this class. It talks about Christians being aliens in a foreign land. It tackles the fact that we change our beliefs to fit the world around us because we wouldn’t want to offend anyone rather than stay true to our gospel and bring it to the people as someplace that they can seek refuge from the world. As much as the church has changed in the last 50 years it would be hard to argue against their point. It also has a great example of a Pastor that wants to open a daycare at their church to minister to the community around them. One of the members explains that she cannot support a daycare in their area because it will only help people that have enough money to put food on the table every night continue to be materialistic. If the church wanted to open a daycare that would help people that have a hard time putting food on the table each day she fully supported that , but at their location there were no people like that close enough to take advantage of their daycare. She did not see it the church’s responsibility to help the people around them get or keep their vacation home or another car or that Jet Ski. What a fresh approach. It also goes into some issues of Pastoral self care so we don’t get burnt out, setting appropriate boundaries and expectations. I am not finished with it but it has been good so far.

The Cardinals start the baseball playoffs tonight in Los Angeles against the Dodgers. I have to root for the Cardinals since they are the only team with a religious affiliation. I would anyway, but it helps. Dad, if you are reading this I’ll go against my normal and put a $1 on the line that the Cardinals will beat the Dodgers. Let me know if you are up for this high stakes wager. Ok, stop laughing. I am cheap and unemployed remember? If I lose, can I deduct the postage to get you the kitty from the money won?

I opened my quotable Bible and I landed on Rejection, so I am going with someone needing to hear this about rejection.

The Lord God hath opened mine ear, and I was not rebellious, neither turned away back. I gave my back to the smiters, and my cheeks to them that plucked off the hair; I hid not my face from shame and spitting. Isaiah 50:5-6 God bless you, Steve

It is a good thing I like to read!

I always have this great concept on Thursday morning, that I will be able to complete my "to do" list by Saturday evening and I can take Sunday afternoon and evening off and watch some football or do whatever. Maybe some week that will work; but it has not worked yet. We were killed with reading for this week in Intro to Bible and Pastoral Care. I am good in that I have all of the homework for this week done, although Greek is a daily task that needs to be taken daily. We have our first major test coming up next week before we head out for Fall Break. This is a very fact intensive class and study will have to be nonstop during any down time until the test.


I did complete one of the books for Pastoral Care over the weekend. It was Life Together by Dietrich Bonhoeffer. Here are some of the points that I felt merited a highlight. The theme of the book overall is what it takes to develop a Christian community and live in a Christian Community. Here they are, my Top 13:

1. The more clearly we learn to recognize that the ground and strength and promise of all our fellowship is in Jesus Christ alone, the more serenely shall we think of our fellowship and pray and hope for it.

2. The basis for all spiritual reality is the clear, manifest, Word of God in Jesus Christ. The basis of all human reality is the dark, turbid urges and desires of the human mind.

3. I find no salvation in my life history, but only in the history of Jesus Christ. Only he who allows himself to be found in Jesus Christ, in His incarnation, His cross, and His resurrection, is with God and God with Him.

4. [Referring to Paul’s “Pray without ceasing”(1Thess. 5:17).] Thus the prayer of the Christian reaches beyond its set time and extends into the heart of his work. It includes the whole day, and in doing so, it does not hinder the work; it promotes it, affirms it, and lends it meaning and joy. Thus every word, every work, every labor of the Christian becomes a prayer; not in the unreal sense of a constant turning away from the task that must be done, but in a real breaking through the hard “it” to the gracious Thou.

5. [On forgiveness and hatred of our brothers] I can no longer condemn or hate a brother for whom I pray, no matter how much trouble he causes me.” [AMEN AMEN. This actually works.]

6. Who can really be faithful in great things if he has not learned to be faithful in the things of daily life?

7. Every Christian community must realize that not only do the weak need the strong, but also the strong cannot exist without the weak. The elimination of the weak is the death of fellowship.

8. He who would learn to serve must first learn to think little of himself….Is it not better to serve our neighbor than to have our own way?

9. The desire for one’s own honor hinders faith.

10. [I love this one] What does it matter if I suffer injustice? Would I not have deserved even worse punishment from God, if He has not dealt with me according to His mercy?  [There is a great theological discussion in this statement.]

11. [This is the life of a pastor] God will constantly be crossing our paths and canceling our plans by sending us people with claims and petitions. [He did this to me last night and I had a great discussion with someone that is having a very difficult time handing things to God.]

12. The root of all sin is pride, superbia.

13. …and that we do not assume that our schedule is our own to manage, but allow it to be arranged by God.

[comments added by me]

There is quite a bit there to ponder. I will leave you with this. Talk to you in a couple of days. God bless, Steve

You can see that the posts slow down as our homework increases. Demands on time are pretty heavy, but this is not much different than demands at work or the demands we will have when we get into our ministry. You just have to figure out the organizing of this particular type of task and manage it. So far, so good.


A front came through here a couple of days ago and it is picture post card perfect weather here. 75 in the daytime and about 55 at night. Sorry, those of you in FL, I know you are still steaming in the sauna.

Thank you for those of you that contributed prayers for Deb. She did get the job! No benefits, but I trust that the Holy Spirit will work this all out for us. I sent an e-mail letter to the VP of business asking that they offer a more comprehensive plan next year. It was forwarded up to the board that oversees this in Chicago. We will see what happens. Who knows, maybe the government will even pass something that will give us coverage. They require coverage if you want to be a student here.

We had a Spiritual Direction meeting last night. There are two spiritual directors that work with the school and have for the last 10 years. There is individual or group spiritual direction offered. I have done some work with a spiritual director and have become a big fan of this. It really helped me sort some things out in a rather difficult time of discernment. I have signed up for individual sessions and start this afternoon. I would like to experience the group sessions at some point as I think this would be a great tool to have in my ministry. The seminary, through one of its endowments picks up most of the cost for the individual and the group is free as each group is led by a senior student that has been in a group. I am really looking forward to this.

Well the “to do” list is a full page long at this point. They all need to be done by Sunday evening. Should be doable I think. Flu Shots today! With all of the people we come in contact with at school and in our field parish I think a flu shot is a must going forward. Good thing I am not squeamish about needles.

Well, back to the list. Have a blessed day! Steve

Are you a Tigger or an Eeyore?

Short post today. We are back to that Tuesday again. LONG day ahead with a Greek quiz at 5:45. I believe I know the material, we will see. We have another required orientation seminar at 1:00pm today, the topic is Alcohol Awareness and the Church. I have never really experienced anyone with that problem in the Church but it makes sense that it could become a problem.


Jason and I did Chapel yesterday and we didn’t do such a hot job. As many times as we have both been up front at church we were both nervous. Our Worship Practicum professor was watching to let us know what could be improved, and we were in front of our colleagues that we see every day. This really surprised both of us. We have a chance to redeem ourselves in December.

Please pray for Deb. She is working the second day of her two day test run at a job as they get to know her and she gets to know them and the job. I guess tomorrow or later this week they will decide if they want to offer her the job. This one has a lot of positives; it just doesn’t have healthcare benefits. She has another job that seems pretty promising also; this one has the healthcare benefits. Thank God healthcare is still going strong and that is her field. One of the reasons healthcare benefits are such a deal with us is that the healthcare offered here at school is less than adequate for older students. I am sure it is great for the twenty something’s, but all of the plans offered, of which there are three, have either no prescription benefit or it is capped at $3000 per year. Those of you that are older know that $3000 per year for prescriptions coverage is pretty poor. You need to be pretty healthy for that to be enough coverage.  I need to find out who is responsible for putting these plans together for us and talk to them about offering a plan with better coverage. I know it will be more expensive, but the alternative will break us. As it is, we have COBRA for this year, but that is over $1000 per month for the family.  I know that this healthcare issue is very explosive, but the way insurance companies can pick and choose to cover you and at what cost is something that has got to be fixed in this country. If you have anything wrong you have to get coverage through a group plan at work. If you have anything wrong and you want to buy a personal plan outside of a group plan forget it. They don’t cover people with anything wrong. Remember the old saying the only banks will lend you money is if you can prove you don’t need it? Same deal.

At this point the big deal here is homework and reading. We have many things due these next two weeks culminating in a test in History of Christianity. Keeping it all straight and what is due when is a little challenging and since I have not been in school for so long it took me a while to develop a system to keep track of it. It’s a little different than business. As deadlines approach in business you are usually talking about them as most times they require more than just your work. Here, the assignments fly parallel and outside of the class work, so you don’t necessarily know that an assignment is coming up. If you keep your ear to the ground, and I do, you can usually catch someone saying something about the assignment and that triggers in your mind that dreadful reaction, “Oh no!”. Since we are in the incoming class I think teachers realize that some of us are just getting back into school and have been pretty good about mentioning the outside of the class assignments.

I hope to have some energy left at the end of the day. If so, I’ll hit the treadmill! Maybe this ended up not being so short after all.

As Randy Pausch says in his "Last Lecture", and I paraphrase; In life you can choose to be a Tigger or an Eeyore.  Choose to be a Tigger!
The most wonderful thing about Tiggers is Tiggers are wonderful things.  There tops are made out of rubber, their bottoms are made out of springs.  Their bouncy bouncy bouncy bouncy fun fun fun fun fun.  But the most wonderful thing about Tiggers is I'm the only one. OH I'M THE ONLY ONE!  Not so fast, Tigger.  I am one too!

Homework

Sorry to have missed a couple of days. OK, this homework is kicking my tail. I think I am going to have to get less “perfect” on my papers. I do three and four revisions to get to the one that I want to submit. I might be over thinking them a little. They are however, putting a big push on writing skills. They don’t feel that the seminary is producing people with the writing skills on par with a graduate level theological school. I have always been complimented on my writing but it was not an academic type of writing, so I am really scrutinizing my papers. Probably too much, but all the Professors are talking about this so I am sure it is high on everyone’s priority list.


I have only had one class since Wednesday and yet things seem to fall into the void and fill the day up so that the checklist of homework and reading doesn’t get accomplished. The way our class schedule is set we pretty much need to have our homework for the week done by Monday morning. That is not a bad thing since I would prefer to have it done anyway. We just don’t really have time on Monday or Tuesday or Wednesday morning to do any homework. Thursday, Friday, Saturday and Sunday are definitely the homework days. We have a class syllabus for each class so we know what is due and when so it all comes together. I had to skip a social outing with my field education church this afternoon to keep on the homework. We have a Clinical Pastoral Education application that we need to fill out. The answer to the second question was 10 pages long. Overall I ended up with 15 pages. It is due on the 8th of October so I am getting it together ahead of schedule which is just where I want to be on all of my work. This is the application for the 400 hours of clinical work. I am hopeful to get Tampa General Hospital. It is the closest to the house that I know of, plus I think it will be a great place for this. I anticipate this 400 hours to be a very emotion filled 10 weeks. However, I will come out the better for it. Better able to minister to people.

I understand we were doing much better on football picks today than last week. I have pretty much given up watching the games at this point. Timing is good, I don’t have a team of all the teams that I root for that is going to even be .500 this year. What good timing!

Jason and I are responsible for Chapel in the morning. First time wearing the collar. I am sure it will go fine. I pray that all is going well in your lives. Thanks for looking in on me and thanks for telling Debbie over the weekend at the Church garage sale that you keep up with me. It is great to know or all of the people riding along on the journey.

Something to think about; If we know WHO we are, do we know WHOSE we are? That is a big topic around here. Who we are and whose we are. It is important to know both.

Blessings, Steve

No classes today and yet I still did not get done what I needed to. It would be easy to assume that I just wasted the day away, but the reality is that I was busy from 8:30 this morning until 8:30 tonight. Seems like every time we have a day with an opening, a vacuum is created and it sucks a day full of things into it. We have several papers and a quiz over the next week, so got to get on it. My goal is to take Sunday off, doesn’t look good at this point, but I don’t know what He will help me accomplish between now and then.


Had a good lunch with the Pastor at my field education church, Pastor Eric. He and I are going to get along very well. We have the same type of demeanor and approach to things. A very good match by the Holy Spirit! My shirts and Alb should be here next week. I actually have a little thing about wearing the collar before I graduate, but I am told that once you are here the church looks at you as a Pastor in training and as such you will look the part as you are acting the part in congregation and community. Yes Sue, they are even calling us that up here. You had it right!

Tomorrow I only have a workshop in Pastoral Care. Mental note, I have to hand in a paper in that class. Yes, that means I still need to do it. Just pick three favorite topics to work on a video that we have to do. No big deal, but it needs to be done and handed in. 90 degrees here today with higher humidity reminded me of Florida. Supposed to be cooler on Saturday. All for tonight.

May the Lord bless you and keep you; calm you and provide for you the strength to accomplish all of the things you need to do. May he keep you safe and give you opportunity to deepen your faith in Him. Steve

Spirituality

Even though it is tough to have our seminars on Tuesday since that day is filled with classes we had a good one today. It was on Spirituality. It gets to our spirituality being like a reservoir rather than a canal. Water that flows into a canal flows right out. Water only flows out of a reservoir if the reservoir is full. Our job/duty is to keep our reservoir filled with water so we have water to give to others.


When I came here I realized that many of the things that fill my reservoir are gone. My spiritual mentor, a spiritual advisor that I regard highly, several good friends that have the same type of spiritual thinking that I do, my time driving (I am one of those people that often drive with the radio off so that I can listen to God), my family, and my worship with a congregation that I consider more family than fellow parishioners. All of these are gone from my life right now. These things are how I kept my reservoir full.

What I also didn’t realize is that there are things here that have taken some over as reservoir filling. Since I have not built any deep relationships yet, the one filling me the most right now is daily chapel. I am building relationships with people that are like minded; I am in an incredibly nurturing environment, and I still have my contemporary Christian music that I listen to (they have a good station here, WMHK 89.7 you should try it……no just kidding). None of these things came to me consciously as a place for me to get my spirituality refilled. I guess you go into the wilderness (remember change), and you find things that fill you spiritually. As we learned in Pastoral Care, God ALWAYS finds us in the wilderness!  Every time I go someplace else I will have to go through the same thing. After this I will at least realize that I have lost my spiritual fulfillment and I need to find new places to get filled up.

Right now my reservoir is maybe 2/3-3/4 full. I am being careful to not over commit myself to things because I know that the classes will get more and more overwhelming as we get closer to the end. They are starting to become more overwhelming mostly due to not knowing what to expect from each professor for tests or for expectations of papers. We also have two classes that are fact intensive. History of Christianity and Intro to Bible. You could fill archives with the facts in these classes, (I know, they do fill archives with these facts :) ). Which ones will we need to know, because there is no way to know all of them. There are also many other things that get scheduled to fill our days even if we are light on classes. I find solace in knowing that God did not bring me here to fail. 

I will continue to keep to the things that I have found to fill my reservoir and look for others. As relationships develop I never know which one will become spiritually fulfilling. I hope you have places to get your spiritual reservoir filled. If not, please pray about that and ask God to help you see where you can get your spiritual fulfillment. It is a long and lonely day without it. Don’t walk alone when you don’t have to, I don't.

The man without the spirit does not accept the things that come from the spirit of God, for they are foolishness to him and he cannot understand them, because they are spiritually discerned.
1 Corinthians 2:14 NIV

Field Church

I went to my field education church today, Mt. Hermon.  Yes, I spelled it correctly, Google it and learn.  They have a contemporary service at 8:15 and a traditional service at 10:30.  I plan to be there for both each Sunday as I have in the past and will be from now on anyway.  I sat in on one of the adult Sunday School classes and had a good class.  They have a large Sunday School curiculum, larger than any of the churches I have been with.  I am meeting with Pastor to go over specific duties on Thursday.  Afterward church, I was taken to lunch.  That was a good time to get to know some of my fellow congregation and on a seminarians budget was a blessing.  Thank you Trudy and Perry, what nice people as are everyone that I have met.  This is a good church, I am blessed to be doing my field education here.  BTW, I have to get my clergy shirts this week as Pastor wants me to wear them at church and on visitations so Jason and I are going over to Cokesbury tomorrow at lunch to get those and order an Alb. 

Got a good hard workout in this afternoon as I try to get back into shape enough to look at a tennis court without having a coronary.  Watched some football, did horrible on picks today, did some homework and will hopefully hit the sack early tonight as it was an early morning.  Pray for Deb please as she has a two day working trial run starting tomorrow for a job that she is excited about.  We can only hope and pray. 

All for tonight.  Have a blessed week. 
The Spirit of the Lord rest on you, the spirit of wisdom and understanding, the spirit of counsel and might, the spirit of knowledge and fear of the Lord; and the blessing of God; Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, be among you and remain with you always.  Amen.

Change

One of the books we have to read for Pastoral Care is When You Are Facing Change by Daniel Lester. It is one of the books on how to adapt to change. Both the change we are going through and the change that so many of those we will minister to will go through. Remember the Wilderness I talked about being change, trouble, anything that we go through that upsets our status quo. This can be a change for the good; it doesn’t have to be bad to cause us stress. I loved this part of what I read today:


“Risk is involved whenever we hear God’s call. We are asked to give up something, to experience an ending, and we may be called to move into an unknown future. Even Abraham, with a clear call from God, did not know the details or what was going to happen or where he was going. Our response to God’s call requires taking one step at a time. (Those in my home congregation of Faith might remember my last sermon about taking the changes we are led to one step at a time.) Through our risking one step, God gives light for the next. When responding to God’s call, we find ourselves supplied with the gifts and abilities with which to accomplish the work.

The point is that when we respond to God’s call. It always involves an ending. Before moving on, we first have to say goodbye to the place where we have been. If we refuse to listen and respond to God’s call, we shrink back from challenge and growth. We draw the circle of our life smaller, and we live on the human level without consideration for the vertical dimension of faith.

I am convinced that as we grow older it becomes increasingly important to be attentive to God’s call. It is easy to settle for what we have, to give up our dreams and hopes, to blot out our sense of vision for life and what it can be. At that point, we begin to die emotionally and spiritually.”

I believe we are learning so much about this so that when God calls us to do something a certain way or go to a certain place we don’t get hung up on our comfort level and prediposed tendencies. When God calls us we have to be comfortable with the change that His will might/will require. If we are inflexible we are not able to follow His will for us as easily. The more flexible we are the more open we are to hearing His word and following His will.

BTW, we had some great fellowship this afternoon with the 5 of us that stay over the weekend. We watched the Gator football game and had some pizza and chili and don’t tell anyone (beer). Only 1! It is not cheap, so it is consumed sparingly. :) Have a great and blessed rest of the weekend.  I leave you with:

The mark of your ignorance is the depth of your belief in injustice and tragedy. What the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the Master calls the butterfly. Richard Bach from Timeless Wisdom

Ok, I said I would talk about Facebook. I talked to a lot of people before I started the blog. Since I had not done either, I needed input. Here is a summation of what I believe they told me. On Facebook there would be a lot of interaction, OR people would be expecting a lot of interaction and people would be posting messages much more frequently and maybe more colorfully and on random subjects. I think they told me that a blog was more for posting what was going on without much of the interaction or expected interaction and there was much less chance someone was going to post a colorful comment. That is why I decided to go with a blog vs. Facebook, I just don’t have time to be on reacting to comments as much as I see Deb, Sam, or Danielle. I also have people of all ages that I hope will be following me. At some point maybe all of this will change but right now I have only one job; pass this semester and be open to my spiritual growth in this loving community environment. My reality right now is that passing this semester means lots of homework and doing all extra workshops and study groups that I can because I don’t really know what it takes to succeed at graduate school since I have never done it. In fact, I have not succeeded at school of any kind for almost 30 years.  So, for those Facebook fans I am excited for you. For me, I hope you keep reading my blog as this is my best opportunity to let you know what is going on in my life at seminary.


We had a spiritual development presentation today about the way Martin Luther suggested to his barber, that he had known for 18 years, how to pray. His barber had asked him if he could tell him how to pray so Martin Luther being Martin Luther he wrote a long paper of about 34 pages on the way that he prays. It was interesting to listen to the thoughts that went through his mind. He was probably one of the most impactful people of the last 1000 years. He changed history while he was still alive. Not many are able to do this. Most of his prayer time focused on his Small Catechism. The best line was that he considered a sermon from the spirit worth 1000 of his prayers. He said in a sermon from the spirit he could learn more than reading and contemplating for many days. Of course a sermon from the spirit is God speaking to us when we are able to be quiet in our prayer time. I need to work on this part of my prayer life. I think I do well in my prayers, but it is mostly about me speaking to God about what I think is important. There goes that I word again. Sometimes I am sure God just looks at me and says “shut up, I have something to tell you”. I make Him work overtime on me when He could be helping someone else. This is one thing that my good friend SueAnn does better than anyone I have ever met. I aspire to listen to God as she does. Of course it is not surprising that He speaks to her as she is so open to what He has to say. I would like to think I am open to what He has to say, I just need to shut up so He can say it. Maybe it is time to take my own advice and shut this down for tonight.

I have not seen any favorite Bible verses yet.

In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express. Romans 8:26 NIV

I ended today with much more energy. What a better feeling! Two classes and work, not too bad. Throw in homework and it starts to get interesting. :) Sam asked about my getting a Facebook page. I will talk about that tomorrow. This one got a little long on me. (Comment added last.)


Not a lot new happening today. Trying to keep up with homework. I know that falling behind will present real challenges so I am working hard to keep caught up. Classes today were History of Christianity, which is a real interesting class. The story of how we got to where we are today is captivating. You know that God had His hand in it because it could have gone so wrong at so many places. In fact, in about the first 300 years it is amazing it survived at all. When you have emperors looking to kill you as an enemy of the state and anything that is bad anywhere gets blamed on you, life could be pretty challenging. There we certainly a lot of disincentives to Christianity in the early times. Of course all of that was completely overcome by the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ. The other class is Pastoral Care. One might ask are we caring for others or ourselves? Good question, both will need care in our ministry. The big point right now in class is that when we find ourselves in the Wilderness (code word for change, anxiety, hurt, pain, life changes, anything that takes us out of our comfort zone) God always finds us. It may not be quickly and it will probably require discernment, but He always finds us and He leads us to His will. We may not choose to go, but that is on us. It’s that whole free will thing we seem to have so much trouble with. He will continue to lead us to His will and love us just as much the tenth/hundredth/thousandth/millionth time we go back as the first time. It is very good stuff! We have to bring our favorite bible verse to class with us on Friday and be ready to talk about how it impacted our call to seminary and how it impacts our life. I am not going to tell you mine now. I want to hear from some of you what your favorite verse is. I will post mine with my Friday post.

Our History Professor asked us if we are talking about the Churchwide Synod Assembly votes on campus (http://www.elca.org/Who-We-Are/Our-Three-Expressions/Churchwide-Organization/Office-of-the-Secretary/ELCA-Governance/Churchwide-Assembly/Actions.aspx ). Please click on this link to see more information on these votes; click on links: “Social Statement..” at the top and Recommendation on Ministry Policies a little below the Social Statement to read what these votes were about. Back to the program….The answer is we are not at this point. Of course there is a lot to still be worked out in November when they try to develop the details about how they are going to implement the changes. It has kind of been the big white elephant sitting in the room so far. Nobody really wants to talk about it in fear of hurting feelings and building walls. Of course, we need to be able to talk about it without building walls and still be family when the discussion is over. In talking with Pastor here we apparently have the ability through class meetings to request a campus wide talk if something is of interest to us. We have a class meeting on the 24th. I think it would be a great time to request that we have a campus wide discussion about this. Of course, the higher classes have already had a campus wide discussion about this as they requested the same thing. I have looked forward to coming to a place of higher learning TO discuss this. I look forward to some very persuasive discussions in a very civil manner. Of course the decision has already been made. That might change the manner of the discussions. The HUGE thing that has not been determined is how everyone will react to this vote. These actions will come as individual, congregational, and maybe even synodical in nature. I know that emotions are very high right now but I hope everyone gives this some discernment before decisions are made and very drastic actions with long term ramifications are taken. I pray for active hearts and minds and slow actions.  I leave you with this:
Beg for knowledge; plead for insight. Look for it as hard as you would for silver or some hidden treasure. If you do, you will know what it means to fear the Lord and you will succeed in learning about God. It is the Lord who gives wisdom; from Him come knowledge and understanding. Proverbs 2:3-6 GNB (Good News Bible)

I know that at least someone is wondering about my picture.  This picture was taken at the ruins in Ephesus, Turkey during our recent Mediterranean cruise. 

As of 40 minutes ago we have had all classes at least once. We have not visited our field church yet, but we have seen all of the classes. I just got back from an hour of the fire alarm going off from a malfunction (so they say, if you here of a dorm fire in Columbia tomorrow you will know that you heard it here first). It was good to get Greek class behind us. Dean Barfield is teaching this class and has such a great teaching demeanor about her. I think we are going to make it. Well ok, I forgot to tell you about the two study sessions available each week. With those we will make it. We had a workshop today at 1:00 so we ended up in class except for one and a half hours from 10:40 am until 8:30 pm. That is a lot of brain drain. My brain is worn out. I was going to try and study, but just don’t have it in me. Tomorrow morning will have to do. I have my field church assignment (I went to the mail area while we were outside for the first fire alarm). I am assigned to Mt. Hermon Lutheran Church. Their website is http://www.mthlc.org/ if you want to see where I will be each Sunday morning. Hopefully I will get to talk to the Pastor tomorrow or Thursday. I am looking forward to it. According to their website they have a contemporary service at 8:15 and a traditional at 10:30.


It has been a long day. I am going to call it a night. It is written, Thou shalt worship the Lord thy God, and Him only shalt thou serve. Matthew 4:10 KJV

OK, some of these have been pretty long so I will give you a break today.  I leave you to ponder these two things.
1.  The possible is possible only at a price of what presently exists.
2.  Christ calls us to take the risk of letting go so God can work His will in us.

Have a great day, see you tomorrow.  God bless you,
Steve

One of the books we have to read for Pastoral Care is Pastor as Person by Gary Harbough. The short story is that this is a book about the stress that Pastors will encounter in their ministry and how to deal with some of it. It summarizes stress as “a pastor’s reaction to frustration, conflict, or pressure, at the heart of which lies the threat of life change and actual or anticipated loss”. It has some great insights into what it takes for us to be healthy emotionally. One of the concepts is that we are not healthy emotionally unless we are in a right relationship with ourselves, our community, and our God. I love the concept “Christians agree that the life-cycle task of integrity is fulfilled in true self-acceptance and we understand our self-acceptance in trust and hope of our already having been accepted by God”. That is some pretty powerful stuff. I don’t know how many people ever reach this point of true self-acceptance. I hope to some day. We should. It should be easy as we rely upon our acceptance by God to know that if God can accept us how can we not accept ourselves? I know we talk a lot about our acceptance and forgiveness that we receive by God through Jesus Christ. I just wonder how many of us believe it at our core and this is one of those things that if you don’t believe it at your core, you don’t really believe it. Enough for the book review.


We tried a new church this morning and were very welcomed by the congregation. Of course around here everyone knows the program of seminary students being assigned to the congregations better than we do. In fact, one of the Masters of Religion students was there. We were also treated to some of the most awesome piano playing that I have ever heard in person. The girl that played is only 15. She competes internationally. She was in a competition this summer in Spain and took third. She gave a concert yesterday and since the piano was set up she came back and played at service today. She played two pieces, “Sonata, Op 31 No. 2” III, Allegretto by Beethoven and “Sonata, Op 31 No. 2” II, Adagio by Beethoven. I added the titles for those of you that might know the pieces. They are not easy pieces and her fingers must have been flying. I would imagine she can write her own ticket to college.

We stopped on the way back for coffee and sat around outside down in the Five Points area. These are the times that coming to seminary will give us that we could not get any other way. We talked for about 45 minutes about life and God and seminary. I am sure the couple sitting next to us wasn’t so impressed but hey, maybe they needed to hear what we had to say, hear the good news. Great times! I look forward to many more of these times over the next four years.

The Lord bless thee, and keep thee; The Lord make His face shine upon thee, and be gracious unto thee. Genesis 32:26 KJV
Steve

What a week! I know it has started out light. We are yet to have two of our classes. Greek and Intro to Bible. I know that the Greek class is going to be very challenging for the almost 30 years out of school mind, but I am looking forward to it. To be able to translate original text of the New Testament is exciting to me. And of course the Bible is something that I need to learn more deeply anyway.


Between working out, class, working, and laundry yesterday just got away from me. Filled right up. I got a lot of studying done today as work was really slow and it is pretty dead in the dorms since half of our hall of 6 goes home on the weekends. Peter came in my room about 5:30 and enlightened me about the necessity of community as well as study. So Jason, Peter and I went out for pizza. The Lord led us to a good pizza place. I know you say, you are giving too much credit to this Lord thing, but I tell you we took a wrong turn from the GPS directions and as we were turning around right in front of us was this pizza place. We went with it and it turned out good! Of course I had asked the Lord to lead us to a good pizza place about 5 minutes prior to that. I guess that all falls under the faith thing. We came back and watched the South Carolina vs. Georgia football game for a while. You know, community! Wait a minute, I think Peter headed off to his room to do some reading in the midst of all that. We are all conscious of the amount of reading we have and try to be reading something that we need to whenever we have a spare 15 minutes.

Tomorrow we try a different church. The last Sunday we will have a choice about where we worship here in Columbia. We will get our Field Education church assignments next week. The church we are going to tomorrow has an 8:30 and an 11:15. The 11:15 is just a lot later than we are used to so we are going to the 8:30. That leaves a couple of guys out as they prefer to sleep in a little. From working before even during the week is sleeping in. As I understand it, Junior year seminarians focus on worship and visitation with their congregation. We will see what the Lord has in store for us.

It was good to get the first week, even though a partial behind us. So many unknowns that we as humans stress over are out of the way. We are underway and now the stress can be the homework, papers, and tests. We are humans and we have to stress about something. However, I must tell you that I am so convinced the Lord wants me here that some of the stress is removed. Those of you that know me know that I will take the work very seriously and give it my all. However, I really feel that God has my back on this and because of that this is doable. There are just so many things that fell into place for this to happen in the first place. Doors have closed on me for several things over the last 5 years and that was one of the things that convinced me that this was my path. In fact the instance where the doors were closing on something potentially life changing was the instance when I knew this was the path and because of that I was at peace that the other door closed. Very unlike me at the time. But the doors on this have miraculously opened at each step. If me, who didn’t even go to church 10 years ago can be led here with doors opening like they have imagine what else He can do in my life AND what He can do in your life!

Good night for now. May the peace that surpasses all understanding be with you as you bring our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ to the world.

Steve

The Power of the Holy Spirit Working in My Life

When I was in the diakonia program, one of my best friends, Sue (who was also in the diakonia program), and I used to talk during the drives back and forth to Sarasota about the high that we got being in class and going to church on the weekend. Then the slow drain we experienced as the week went on. Our thought was that if we could get rejuvenated during the middle of the week it would keep us from draining so low by the time the week was over. Well, the thought that rejuvenation during the week would help us get through the week was accurate, at least for me. I can’t remember anytime that I have come through the week with such great energy for the Lord. We go to chapel each day during the week. On Thursday it is in the evening and a little more formal with communion. Worship with that many enthusiastic people is still something I marvel at each time it happens. No the newness has not worn off, and I am glad for it. It is not only the chapel, but also the classes, the whole environment really. It all comes together to nurture us and move us closer to our Lord and Savior. I have no idea how many of you would even want to experience this if you could, but if you had any interest in it the feelings would just overwhelm you. As I went through the process to come here I never came close to envisioning what it actually feels like to be here. I knew that I sought to focus my life on the Lord and that I would feel better and more energized for Him, but it was nothing like this in my thoughts. I am going to try and discern why it is that I feel like this over the next months that we will be here this year. It might be just as easy as I have finally found where I am supposed to be, I don’t know. I will let you know what I come up with.


Class was good today, had a chance to fine tune my notes by listening to one of my Wednesday classes again (many of us record our classes so we can go back and get better notes from the class and hear it a second time). Work this afternoon and early evening followed by Chapel at 6:00. The new Dean, Dean Barfield was installed tonight. She is going to be a great Dean. We then had a meeting for Seminarian Partnership program that is offered. Back here about 8:30 and the TV was vacant. My thought was great I can watch the NFL game tonight that starts the season. Well after quickly reviewing everything I still need to do tonight, like still eat dinner, I decided I don’t really have time to watch that game after all. That is probably why the TV is not being watched in the first place.

As you can probably tell all is going well here, but then again that would be expected since we have not had any tests or been graded on anything yet! Thanks for following me. If even 1% of my energy for the Lord comes through this writing to you then it has to be a positive thing. I pray that your faith may deepen through your interaction with the rest of the world as we live the love of Christ to our neighbors. God bless you, Steve.

If you are reading with me, please go ahead and follow me.  Just click on Follow over to the right.  It's pretty easy.  The more followers I get the better.  The one with the most wins!  :)

This won't be too long since it is already almost 10:30 at night.  Classes today were great.  We actually pray as class starts.  We talk about Jesus, God, Love and nobody is there to arrest you or threaten a lawsuit or talk bad about on the radio.  They don't let the ACLU in our classes either.  I love this place!

We had Church History this morining and Pastoral Care this afternoon.  I like both of the teachers and I believe I am going to enjoy both of the classes.  We already have a bunch of reading to do.  We learned two new acronyms today; WIGIAT (Where is God in All This) and WTF get your mind out of the gutter!  This is a family blog!  (Wheres the Faith)  We seem to love acronyms. 

I worked my first shift in the computer lab.  Not much going on yet in that area, but I am getting familiarized with the computers, the printers, the scanner, and the supplies.  So far I have been able to answer the questions I have been asked, so far. 

I finallly got into the gym and got on the treadmill.  The area is just a couple of rooms together with some equipment in it, but it works for me.  Crank up the radio on contemporary christian music and get a good workout.  Safe too!

I had the meeting with the Professor that assigns us to our field education church this morning.  It looks like I will not be able to apply for the Synodical Deacon position here for a couple of reasons.  First, it will confuse the congregation as they will see me as a pastor even though I am not yet ordained and second because as far as I can tell they don't have Synodical Deacons in this synod.  So much for that track of thought. 

Only one class tomorrow.  I would imagine that I will do my shut in visits on Thursday or Friday.  We are required to do 2 of them per week in our new congregation as I understand things.

Weather is great.  About 85 and about half the humidity of Florida.  It feels great.

All for now, getting late.  Talk to you tomorrow, God bless and keep you safe.
Steve

Orientation Finally Here

Yes, it finally got here, Orientation. It was a great day of getting to know the staff and faculty. We had worship at 10:00 as we do each weekday morning except Thursday because we have Eucharist at Chapel at 6:00pm on Thursday evenings. We probably had 150 people in chapel, which by the way is beautiful with a grand looking pipe organ. Roger, pictures will be coming your way. The feeling in there when we sang and responded was incredible. It is the kind of thing that gives you goose bumps. To worship with 150 people who are so enthusiastic and projecting their voices, was amazing. The only other time I had an experience like this was worshipping at the Synod Meetings in Orlando and I think we had about 600 people there. This will be a great thing to go to everyday.


I finally met the IT Manager so I guess I am officially on the “geeky squad”. I guess I can’t use geek squad since Best Buy has that tied up. With some of the questions that were being asked about getting on their computers I think we will have plenty of work for the first week at least. But we are here to serve. The IT Manager is even helping Peter with his laptop since he is having some virus issues.

As a Junior we are also assigned to a mentor group. We met today and I think this is going to be a great thing. They used to have one on one mentor assignments, but they feel we will all get to know more people, more quickly by doing the group idea. You know the mega churches are very big on the small group concept and as I was visiting their churches I felt the small groups were one of the reasons they are as successful as they are. You are part of the bigger church, but you get your smaller more intimate feeling from the small groups. We went through getting to know each other and our faith stories. We will probably have to tell our faith stories thousands of times according to them. I will put mine up here one of these days.

With all that was thrown at us today it is real easy to over commit to things. I am very aware of that and am at the limit of my commitments at this point without backing something else out.

We already have received our first reading assignment and we have not even been in the class. We only have that class on Mon and Tues so we end up not starting it until next week. My academic advisor has asked the group of new students that we have to get together for lunch next Monday to get to know each other. Sounds like a good idea. She seems like a neat person with lots of energy. We will see what kind of academic advice she has. Our Dean is new in her position this year. She seems great also. Such a great demeanor and she is my Greek teacher. I think Greek and other subjects where you have a high chance of not getting it the first time through are very impacted by the teacher you have and their approach. I can already tell she has a great approach and that I am better off having come to Fall full year Greek than to have tried to cram it all into Summer Greek.

I have an appointment with my Field Education advisor tomorrow morning to find out what congregation I will be joining to worship and do field education with this year. We meet for 15 minutes or so with a questionnaire filled out and he assigns us over the next week or two. As I said before, I think there are already two seminary students at the congregations, one from each year of school. I am sure the Holy Spirit will be working to get me to the place I am supposed to be.

Well, time to get ready for bed and get a good night of sleep before classes tomorrow. Take care, God bless.

Steve